Unease with no name

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Hello everyone,

First of all I want to apologize for my broken English because I come from France and I think I'll have some difficulty expressing myself to tell my story!

If I'm here, it's because I'm a little (ok completely) worried about what is happened to me for 2 years.

To explain briefly, I feel totally different than before. In fact, overnight, I started to have very bizarre symptoms throughout the body as well as indescribable "psychological sensations". I can't really describe it. Certain sensations look like depersonalization disorder but there is a part of my unease that is completely unknown: it's a very very strange feeling that every emotion I've ever known has been replaced by others absolutely unpleasant and which makes me feel very uncomfortable. (I know it's really weird). 

These strange emotions trigger in any situation and they prevent me to enjoy my life. It's a true encumbrance because everything seems very cold and murky without any reasons. I really think that life is beautiful but my brain or my mind is just trying to convince me otherwise by making me feel these inhuman and unknown feelings. 

Furthermore, I can't feel happiness or good feelings anymore. My old familiar feelings seem definitely gone and I am now forced to live like this because I didn't find a way to cure this and never meet someone who described similar facts. So, I feel very lonely and even if my boyfriend and my family listen to me, it's still hard to bear...

So, does anyone understand what I'm trying to explain or know what is happening to me? (I'm so sorry if I'm not understandable, it's already hard to explain this in my own language so in English...). Anyway, I want to thank you for taking time to read my story and please give me your opinion :).

Bye for now!

 

Lily